Stuff

As I sit here today, I feel good about where the girls and I are at. I feel proud that we are all moving forward in this life and that we are still making Joel a part of our daily lives. We all understand very well that he is dead, but we still involve in our lives by talking about how he would have liked what we were doing, the pride he would have with the choices we make........things like that. I feel so blessed to have such wonderful little girls who keep me going each day and great friends who support me and love me for who I am and what I am doing. I have decided that I am going to wait until January to get a job. Origianlly I was going to try and start in November but then as I got bored, I thought I would go back now. But now as things for the holiday's, the house and just daily life with the girls keep stacking up, I have decided that January would be the best time to go back. I know that seems like a long time and I do need to start back to work, but I don't want to make to many changes for the girls right now. I feel good about this decision, but at the same time, I am feel as though I am ready to work again. I guess I worry that I am not proving enough for the girls and that I am not making a good example. Most days I am busy and don't just sit around to much, but I do have those days where I just am not motivated. I just want to set a good example for the girls and I hope I am doing that.