Glo

You did make me laugh girl! I can SO relate to everything you wrote. I think I have said before that I am not from these parts at all! I am so not a city girl, I grew up in Hot Springs, SD and went to college in Omaha at Creighton University. If you have ever been to Hot Springs then you know that I did not grow up in a big city, nor was it a town with a lot of luxury! Before living in Hot Springs, I lived in a tiny town called Howard, this is where everyone knows you are in town(even if it has been 3 years since the last visit), even before you hit the edge of town. I miss the small town living actually but I do not miss the gossip and chatter that comes along with it. Hopefully in a year or two we will be out of Houston, (that is the plan for now) and on a little chunk of land in the country or in that small town lifestyle not far from the city but far enough that it does not crawl in your back door. Thanks for making me laugh Glo!

Getting On Track

Ok, so life is getting better, I think. No news on the truck, it will take about 20 to 30 days to process so in the meantime we are just hoping that if it does turn up at this point, it is deemed a total loss. I know that sounds a little strange, but at this point if it is returned, who knows what kind of shape it is in! So other than the truck being stolen, life is pretty darn boring around here. I am trying to stay on top of the house work (I will let you all know when I finally make that happen!), get the girls to all of their activities and keep running. Pretty normal, pretty boring but I am finding that I am ok with this! The less drama and heartache the better! One thing that has been happening is Bren is going through her second grieving phase I think. She has had a tough time with it all and been really sad and frustrated. I am grateful that she is able to verbalize to me how she is feeling, but at the same time, I still wish she did not have to go through this. I am also very grateful that she has her big sister to help her. At night when they are going to bed, I can hear them whispering in their room about papa and how they both miss him and then Faith telling Brenna what she thinks or does to make her feel better. The first time I heard Faith say this to Bren, I sat there and cried. I am glad that she is brave and strong enough to do this though, I think it is good for Brenna to hear it from her big sis and not just from mama or Justin. This has been going on for a few weeks now, I have not written much about it because this has been really hard on all of us. Bren is a very sensitive little girl and when she is sad, she gets really sad and very down on herself. It has been hard for me to help her, cope with it and get her through it. So to write about it has been even more difficult. I don't know if I have even really talked about it to many people. It is scary at times and very easy to tell myself I am not doing it right, if I was, my daughter would not be so sad or would not get down on herself. I know that is not true, I know that is just how she is, she is like her mama. Speaking of Bren, she is sitting here thumbing Faith's guitar strings and patiently waiting for me to be done, so I suppose I better get to it. I will let you know if I stay on top of that house work! YEAH RIGHT!!!!!

Crazy, Crazy!!!

Ok, so as if the last weeks were not enough to scare me and make me want to get the heck out of Houston, Justin's truck got stolen Friday from a Hooters Restaurant! He is so sad, upset and worried. I feel so bad for him and can't help but keep thinking that we need to get the heck out of dodge and leave it in the dust. I know this type of stuff happens every day everywhere, but the fact that it is happening so close to home and to us makes it even scarier. After getting over the initial shock of his truck being gone and getting used to the fact that we can't just load up the 4-wheeler and go let the girls ride, or load up junk and take it to the dump, we will be ok. Justin is actually doing surprisingly well. He said, as long as the insurance company takes care of me and my loan, this may be better for us, it will erase one part of debt and help us get where we need to get. I think the hardest part for him is having just one car right now. I am ok with it, the girls and I don't go anywhere during the day and there are ways to make the activities fit in with our limited car arrangements. He is struggeling though, but I know he will get over it. I am just glad that he was not out there when it was happening. It is so scary to me to know how many car thefts go wrong in Houston. In the last week there has been a half dozen or so shot or stabbed from car thefts/jackings gone wrong. I can't and won't even think that way. Well, I need to get to my girls. We are watching Evan Almighty this morning and then maybe off to the pool this afternoon. We will see. Faith is out of school today, so we are going to try and have fun today.

On my mind today

Ok, so my mind is not quite right, nothing new to me but maybe for some of my fellow bloggers it is. A large portion of the day today has been spent lookin up sexual offenders on the Watch Dog Website http://www.familywatchdog.us. It has scared the crap out of me, made me sick to my stomach and wishing I did not live in Houston. Here is why I started to search anyways. Last week a little girl in Faith's grade was kidnapped just a couple hundred feet away from her bus stop, it was very scary, but even scarier that my daughter new her, played with her and understands what happened to this little girl. The little girl is back home, thank god, but not without emotional scarring for life. It was very scary when it happened and is still today. I have searched watch dog many times before but since this happened I have been on twice in these two weeks. This is the scary part, when I checked last week, there was only one man that was within a mile of my home and .14 miles from the school(that was scary) and today when I checked there was another man that just moved in to our neighborhood and he is actually just across the street a little ways. I know that it is good that I am aware, but it is scary that there are so many and that the majority of them were sexual contact with a child. I guess sometimes it is better to be over protective and cautious. We have had so many chats with the girls about this that they are now thinking it is normal everyday conversation. It is somewhat funny, but also very sad to me, I wish they did not have to grow up this way. I posted the link up above so those of you who have not ever checked, can or pass the link on to your loved ones. It never hurts to be aware of who is living next to or your schools.

Sick

Sorry I have missed so many days. I have been feeling really under the weather and out of it the last few days. It has to be all the temperature changes we have had recently and the pollen in the air. Between cold stuff and allergy stuff, it is miserable. I am sorry I have not gotten on more or gotten on sooner, but it just seemed like there was not any time or energy lately. I don't have anymore running stories this week, but I know I will have some soon! Take care ya'll and I will be on again soon. Just gotta get over this crud! Hopefully we will see you all tomorrow!

Hello!

Hello All! I know it has been a few days since I have been on, but it has been crazy, crazy, crazy and crazier here lately. We had soccer all day on Saturday and by the time we got home we all had had enough for the day, so we just vegged! Sunday was another lazy day for the most part. I went out and ran some errands and Justin did some yard work and took it easy. It was a nice weekend, but what started out as nice was quickly replace by a fast and furiou few days! The week prior was the same.....oh well. I have been running quite a bit these last 5 days. I think I have logged 11-13 miles this week. Not to bad for just starting out again and it has been since Sunday that I started my weekly tally. It is really quite interesting running with a jogging stroller again. I mean, my kiddo's were tiny when I did it last time, less than 30lb's each and now I am running with a 45lb preschooler who does not know how to sit still! That makes it even more challenging! It has been good though. Justin put it into perspective for me today, he said, Geeze Mary, when you go out running without that jogger you are going to feel like your flying! Way to train for your next marathon! I know he is right too! I can feel it in my hips and quads and shoulders from pushing the stroller. I guess I forgot how much you have to push with your legs when your struggling to push 50+ pounds in front of you! Not to mention keeping the dog close by and at bay so he does not go chasing the ducks! I have been taking Max(our golden retriever) with us lately (he is on a diet, he weighed 109 pounds in march!) and he loves all the "wildlife" that is out there, I forgot about the ducks for a while, but he quickly reminded me that the ducks are out and about! Here is a quick story to get you laughing. Last week or so I took Max running with us and like I said, I forgot about the ducks that occupy the ponds in our neighborhood. So we are running, Bren has his leash(after a half mile the dog is pretty well sluggish and stays close, he should he is 30 pounds over weight!) and we are going on our way and just as Brenna says, "look at the ducks!" Max hears ducks and he is gone, off like a rocket for the ducks. So here I am, on a bridge that will roll Bren backwards if I let go now and she will surely fly into the road, a dog that is running faster than I have seen him run since he chased Faith on the four wheeler at the ranch. I had no clue what to do! So in a split second I thought, push the stroller forward to the grass, it will stop, get Max before he goes into the pond after all the ducks or worse, kills one infront of my baby girl. So I do just that, Bren is screaming when she realizes that I have let go and that Max is headed for the duck and might hurt him. I get Max(barely) by stepping on the end of his leash, he comes jerking back into me and I almost topple ontop of him and start the whole process over again! It was not so funny when it happened and I was not in the mood to think it was funny for a few days. I have now gotten over myself and see how damn funny it is and realize, that this could only happen to me! It took me a while to take Max again, but he is now on pretty good behaviour and does well with the ducks. I do have to say I am proud of him for co-existing with his "natural" prey! Take care you all and maybe, just maybe I will have another funny story to share tomorrow!

For Widows Who Read This

This is a link for other widows who read this silly blog and for those who know widows. I just received a mailer from Army Long Term Family Case Management there is a website that we can go to and see what other benefits we may be eligible for, or for back pay that may be due to the families. I wanted to post this on here because I know if I did not know about it until now, many others may not either. Here is the link. https://www.hrc.army.mil/site/active/tagd/cmaoc/altfcm/benefits.htm If it does not work, let me know I can get the right address to you.

More Stuff

I read some of the comments and I had to laugh right along with you. I just wish I had taken a photo to send ya'll. Well, we got the garden done yesterday, minus a few bags of mulch I miscalculated on. I should get them out today if the weather holds out and then I will take pictures and post them. It looks pretty nice, different than the huge ol' bushes we had in there. I had to get rid of them, I despised them. We have already had a few butterflies on the plants and that made the girls so excited, they worked even harder with me last night. Faith said, "mama we just did this and the butterflies already know that we are helping them!" To see her face and hear the happiness in the voice was one of the best rewards as a mom. Glo, well I did not grow up in Missouri, but I did grow up in South Dakota so I think that's about the same right? MQ, the girls love, love Tae Kwon Do. Bren is in Tiny Tigers and she is working on getting her yellow belt. Faith has had some more troubles earning her belts, but she is working on her orange. We just started about 2 months ago, maybe 3 and they have both done really well. I think once Faith gets over her worry about getting my approval all the time, she will do really really well. She practices and practices now and she does well at home, but gets to TKD and does not do so well. She gets so nervous! It is pretty cute though. I have to tell a story. A month ago they had their first belt testing and she did not earn her 3rd strips so she could test. She was devastated because Bren got her new belt. I think she was a little embarrassed too. We have been practicing and working on it since so she can earn that third stripe. The other day she went through her form once and I said why don't you do it a few more times and then practice your kicks nice and slow while I get dinner on the table. She said OK, but when I looked she was just sitting on the couch. I got onto her a little bit, but she never got to practicing. So finally I asked her why she would not practice, these are her words; "mama, I don't want to mess up, I just did it perfectly and if I keep doing it I will do it wrong. I don't want to mess up my kicks either". She is such a little perfectionist, just like her papa, it was cute but sad at the same time. I then talked to her about having to make mistakes to learn and get better and without practice we will never get better. She said, "did my papa have to practice a lot? You always say he was so good at everything, I am sure he did not have to practice." I laughed, a lot. "Yes, your papa had to practice and he practiced a lot. He made a lot of mistakes too, but he always learned from them and fast." She smiled and said OK. I know one day I will tell them about mistakes he made as a young adult(high school), to help them understand and know their papa better and hear stories that he would have told them himself to make a point and keep them from making the same mistakes. Anyways, I thought this was a cute little story and a great learning process for all of us here. Take care ya'll and talk to you soon ps--Glo I am in Texas! pps-Heidi, Wear the boots girl!!!! Even if you aren't a boot wearer! My neighbor killed 3 baby diamond backs and he saw a water moccasin, I worry about my dogs! I can't put leather boots on them!

Running

Thanks everyone for giving me a little push for the running. I needed it. I did go run on Tuesday and it felt pretty good. I wanted to go run yesterday but I was a little under the weather, so I didn't get it done. I want to go today but between the girls Tae Kwon Do, dentist appointments and just life, I don't know if it will get done today. I know I will be out there tomorrow though. To Stephanie, look for an e-mail from me later. I am going to try and write later, I don't know if you have a junk mail folder like mine, but finding an e-mail in there is like looking for a needle in a haystack if you aren't checking constantly! Take care ya'll and talk to you soon! Mary

So What DO my neighbors think???!!

Well, I had to write about this because I think it is pretty funny and actually quite ridiculous that I even gave it any thought. As I wrote before we are working on the front of our house and we basically started all over from scratch. So today I decided it was a wonderful day to pull out 4 huge bushes and then start planting a minimum of 20 plants(that was just to get started). Bren and Faith want a butterfly garden so that involves lots of different plants when you have a 5 and 7 year old planning it!!! Anyways, as I am outside today my nieghbors are out, landscape guys are out working on yards and more than once I caught a few people staring at what I was doing. At first I was very paranoid thinking, "oh no, am I going to get into trouble with the Homeowners Assoc. for not getting approval or am I making a fool out of myself." I gave this a little thought and then one of my other neighbors came out, I was taking a little break, cleaning up and sweeping off the walk. She just stared at me, I said hello and she said Hi (real fast and short) and turned around. I thought about it again, then I took a good look at myself in the front door. OH BOY!!!! I looked so ridiculous! I wish I had a picture to show you all. I realized just then what I had thrown on to work in the yard, picture this---brown cowboy boots(keeps the feet cleaner and protects my toes and body if I find a snake!), short tan colored shorts(that are a little snug) a brown t-shirt and a mud streaked face and arms to go along with it. Not mention my hair was wild and crazy looking from the wind. I am sure my neighbors were watching me thinking I had certainly lost my mind!! I guess I would think the same thing. Oh well, I don't care to much, it is my yard and I was comfortable for the most part(minus the snug shorts!) Good thing they did not see my socks, one was navy blue and one was light blue, I am sure they would have fun looking at me then!! What's the sense in looking nice when your just going to get dirty?!?! Take care ya'll!

Where did my mojo go?!

Well, the mojo is gone, gone, gone! I was doing so good with my running and keeping on top of everything. It seems in the last few months the mojo has slipped, but even right now, I have the desire to do it, just not the get up and go! I am getting sick of it really. So as silly as this sound, I am going to write every day about running and when, maybe you can all help keep me accountable and I will kick some butt on it once again! When I ran so much this summer, it helped me so much and I always felt a little closer to Joel during that hour or so of running. I need that again, I know I do. I need to get out there again. I will let you know if I run today and how far. Mojo needs to come back!!!!