Merry Christmas Wherever You Are

Have you ever heard the song Merry Christmas Wherever You Are? by George Straight. It just came on my IPod and as I sit here listening to it, I know it aimed at those who have split up or divorced, but it made me so sad. I know where my Joel is, I know what has happened to him, but we have put up his stocking still. I know this will become a tradition and that is ok with me, but damn it, I wish I was filling it with trinkets and junk instead of letters and drawings. And putting a little envelope under the tree with the gift I have decided to do for him. I have donated $750 to Faith's school in his memory and will donate $3o0 to four children who lost their father 3 years ago in Iraq and just recently lost their mother to a cruel and heartless murder. These are the gifts I know he would have done if he were here, so I want to share this with my girls and make this a continuous gift we do yearly. So, to my Joel, as I sit here, getting ready to write my Christmas gifts to you, I want you to know that I miss you dearly. That I love you more than life itself and will always. You gave me so much and filled my life with so much joy. I miss our talks, our phone calls when you were on the way home from work, even though I was going to see you in 15 minutes, it seemed to be the only time we could catch up before the girls ganged up on you. I miss our arguments and battles about everything from kids, life to silly work stuff. I miss your smile and beautiful black hair. I miss your strength and courage, but mostly I miss your presence and love that was unending, no matter how upset your were. Merry Christmas my love and I pray that you have a beautiful and wonderful Christmas celebrating with Jesus. All my love, forever and Always, ME